


back for you

by Hellokaelyn



Category: NCIS
Genre: F/M, OOC, Post-Episode: s16e18 Mona Lisa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-05
Updated: 2019-04-05
Packaged: 2020-01-05 02:00:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,147
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18356300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hellokaelyn/pseuds/Hellokaelyn
Summary: Before they can make up, Nick gets hurt. He has a choice to make..





	back for you

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by an Anon on the torresandbishop blog on Tumblr 😊
> 
> If it feels rushed..that was because I was falling asleep while writing and wanted to finish it 😅

This wasn't supposed to happen.

It  _ wasn't _ .

Ellie was sure the universe was laughing at her, finger pointing and all. First she and Nick had a fight (could it even be called a fight though?), one that cut deep enough that two weeks later they still weren't talking. Sure they talked in front of Gibbs when working a case but that was as far as it went. As soon as they were told to go home, Nick would be the first one heading towards the elevator or stairs leaving a crushing feeling inside her and McGee giving her a encouraging but pitying smile. 

And now..now here she was, the universe laughing as she waited for news on the man she possibly loved, a man who still could barely look at her. 

She was terrified. Absolutely terrified. 

Ellie thought of Qasim, how it had hurt deeply. She knew if it wasn't good news, it would in a way be so much worse. Qasim knew how she felt (she refused to think of how he didn't know her answer to his proposal right now), they were on good terms, and if she was honest she wouldn't have thought of him as her  _ best friend _ . 

But Nick..he had no idea how she felt for him, and they  _ weren't _ on good terms. If she couldn't solve things between them..she didn't know what she'd do. And the idea of losing another best friend, it was a feeling that shook her. 

Staring at the clock on the wall watching the time pass slowly, she could feel McGee gripping one hand with Jack holding the other. Gibbs sat on Jack's other side, glancing at her every now and then while sharing looks with the other two. 

None of them said he'd be okay and for that she was grateful. She wanted no empty promises or lies just to try and make her feel better. 

_ Ellie's body froze for a second and everything seemed to move in slow motion.  _

_ Tires screeching as a car quickly turned the corner, a gun appearing out one of the windows firing before either of them could begin to react, the car speeding away, Nick dropping to the ground, blood..so much blood.  _

_ She ran towards him, dropping and sliding to her knees beside him. _

_ “Nick!” She choked out, taking off her jacket to try and slow the bleeding. Ellie could hear shouts of people saying they were calling 911 that sounded so far away and cloudy.  _

_ “E-Ell-” He tried saying, choking out the words and gasping. _

_ “For once in your life Nick, shut up.” Ellie said as sternly as she could with tears falling down her cheeks and her voice shaking. _

_ Flashes of Qasim covered in blood floated to the surface that she tried shoving away. No. No this wouldn't end the same, it couldn't.  _

_ Nick coughed, blood coming from his mouth making her panic rise.  _

_ “You're gonna be okay.” She kept repeating. For him or herself she wasn't sure.  _

_ His eyes drifted shut. _

_ “Nick!”  _

Ellie jumped out of the memory as McGee and Jack let go of her hands and stood. She shot up on wobbly legs when she spotted the doctor, the one who made Gibbs hold her back as she tried following Nick and the crowd of nurses even when they told her she couldn't go any further.

“There were some complications..”

* * *

_ Nick stood in the middle of the empty squad room.  _

_ “What the hell is going on?” He said to himself. It was completely empty. While the furniture was still in place there were no people, all the desks devoid of anything, and an eerie feeling came from the usually bright welcoming orange walls.  _

_ A chill went down his spine that only spread when he went to the window only to see absolutely nothing out of it. _

_ “You're stuck.” _

_ Nick jumped, looking wide eyed. “R-Reeves?” _

_ Clayton Reeves in all his suit wearing glory smiled. “Long time no see mate.”  _

_ “Okay seriously what the hell is going on?!” Nick said, voice high bordering on panic. “You're dead Reeves!”  _

_ “I am.” He sighed.  _

_ “Am I..” Nick swallowed trailing off.  _

_ “No, but you're pretty damn close.” _

_ “I'm gonna need you to say more words man.” Frustration seeping through his tone. _

_ “Still as impatient as ever.” Reeves said with a chuckle. “Right now you're lying in a hospital bed after getting shot, twice. You actually did die during surgery but the doctors brought you back, but there were some other complications. You're alive yeah, but you aren't breathing on your own. Depending on what you decide here, when the doctor removes it..you either start breathing on your own, or you die.”  _

_ “What's..here?”  _

_ Reeves shrugged. “Doesn't have a name, it's where people come to when they have to decide if they want to live or die. And you're stuck here until you do.”  _

_ “And you being here?” _

_ “Just a friendly face.” Reeves said with a grin. _

_ Nick scoffed. “An ugly one.” _

_ Reeves laughed loudly, clapping a hand on his shoulder. “Never thought I'd miss hearing your rubbish.”  _

_ Nick's body tensed as he felt the hand on his shoulder. Before he could even think, he pulled Reeves in for a hug. With a chuckle the other man seemed to have no problem with it as he returned it.  _

_ “I've really missed you bro.” Nick choked out pulling away.  _

_ Reeves smiled. “Well of course you did.” _

_ Nick huffed and shoved his shoulder.  _

_ “I think it's time to get down to business Nick.” His face turned serious. “Do you already know your decision?” _

_ Two weeks ago he would have said yes. Two weeks ago he would have said he wanted to go back.  _

_ But he couldn't forget everything. Getting roofied, the waking up not remembering, the girl, Ellie's words, how things had ended when he walked away, the thoughts he had during Kohl's case coming back full force, how ever since he's had to force himself to get out of bed in the mornings..he was just tired. He'd go to sleep waking up gasping for air covered in sweat as he dreamt of actually being the murderer, sometimes mixed in with things he had done while undercover that had haunted his dreams for a while.  _

_ “Nick.” Reeves said, voice soft and with an edge of worry. “Are you really considering..” _

_ He let out a shuddering breath. “It's like after everything from all my years as an agent, I'm cracking.” He laughed humorlessly. “All because I was an idiot who got himself roofied!”  _

_ “I know what's been going on.” Reeves said, he scoffed at Nick's surprised look. “You guys are the closest I had to family, of course I've been keeping tabs. You've been talking to Sloane-” _

_ “Yeah.” Nick looked out the blank window. “It's not exactly helping. She told me she was giving it another week before telling Gibbs to pull me from the field.”  _

_ “I have a theory on why talking to Sloane isn't helping at all.” Nick looked at him. “I would bet anything most of this weight on you, stress, and guilt, is because how things are between you and Ellie.”  _

_ “What? That's crazy-” _

_ “Is it?” Reeves lifted an eyebrow. “Those dreams of you being the murderer, we both know where that's coming from. Her words cut you deep Nick considering you had thought of yourself as a killer many times before, but you understand why she said it.” _

_ Nick nodded. He knew why she did. Not only as part of the job, but because of who Ellie was. It was logical to her, her analyst brain taking over. It didn't mean the words didn't cut deep, only worsened by her trying to play it off as a joke and then her telling him he'd do the same.  _

_ “So why haven't you told her? You guys need to just talk it out.”  _

_ “Because..” He ran a hand down his face. “Because I'm afraid I'll lash out like I usually do, which not only would make things worse but I know I'd hurt Ellie too.”  _

_ “And you don't think this isn't hurting her?” Reeves scoffed. “Mate, you may not see it but those feelings you have for her are returned.” _

_ “What? I never said anything about-”  _

_ Reeves threw his head back laughing loudly. “You're pretty obvious, and I know Ellie well enough to see her feelings obviously too. Seriously, you not talking to her is hurting her just as much you.” _

_ Nick breathed out slowly looking away from Reeves to think. If he was being honest, Ellie was on his number one list when it came to choosing to go back. Could he really choose to leave her? To make her go through the pain of losing another person? And if what Reeves said was true..to make her go through losing another guy she has feelings for?  _

_ He couldn't. No matter how hurt or angry, she was still Ellie. Someone who suffered so much but still had the strength to push forward. Ellie who made him try goat yoga, who was there when he was missing Reeves, who listened to his dumb ideas even when she was making fun of them, who he went through the whole looking after a baby experience with.  _

_ Nick opened his mouth to give his answer when he heard it. _

_ “I have faith in you.”  _

_ It was like a faint whisper in his head. Her voice.  _

_ Reeves grinned. _

* * *

When the doctor was ready to let Nick try and breathe on his own, Ellie held her breath. Gibbs and Jack stood on either side of her almost as if in support. 

She knew they knew, it had become obvious since Nick ended up in the hospital but especially so when you could rarely find her anywhere other than by his side holding his hand. 

As the heart monitor beeped, Ellie felt herself drop. Gibbs quickly grabbed her, being the only thing keeping her up at that moment. 

“He's okay Ellie.” Jack whispered, rubbing her arm. “He's alive.” 

* * *

It wasn't until Nick was released from the hospital and resting on his couch that they were finally truly alone. 

Ellie had been running back and forth gathering things for him so he wouldn't have to try and get up. But Nick grabbed her hand, giving it a little yank.

Knowing what he wanted, she tried not to anxiously fiddle with her fingers as she sat on the coffee table in front of him. 

“Ellie I-”

“I'm sorry!” She blurted out. “I was really insensitive to how you were feeling after everything even when I could see it all over your face! I just didn't know what to say after it was all over and it was just so tense and awkward, so I resorted to humor and it was wrong timing for it and completely uncalled for. And I do have faith in you Nick I have  _ so _ much then when I said you'd do the same I said it because I figured as an investigator you would but I didn't take into account that-”

Nick cut her rambling off by pressing his lips to hers. Ellie let out a small surprised noise but as she kissed back and her hand moved to grip the back of his neck, he felt as if he was flying.  

For a second he wondered if the doctors had given him  _ too _ much meds to take. 

Slowly they separated. Ellie looking a little dazed at the sudden kiss. 

“Does this- does that mean you don't hate me anymore?”

Nick frowned. “I never hated you Ellie, it was all hurt with only a bit of anger.” He grabbed her hand tracing along the palm of her hand with his finger. “I'm sorry for not talking to you sooner.”

Ellie shook her head. “You don't have anything to  _ be _ sorry for Nick.”

“I do. I knew why you said what you did, and although that didn't make it hurt any less I still should have told you I understood.” 

“And..that kiss?” 

Nick smiled and Ellie wanted to cry, she had missed it especially being directed at her. 

“The reason it all cut so deep was from past thoughts I had but the main reason, my feelings for you go way beyond friendship Ellie so when you said-”

This time Ellie cut him off with a kiss. Nick didn't mind in the slightest. 

“I like you too Nick, as way more than a friend.” She whispered.

He grinned. “Good ‘cause this would have been very awkward otherwise.”

Ellie shook her head with a small laugh. Both of them feeling lighter as they leaned in for another kiss.

While their relationship would still need mending, they would move through it together. Nick would continue to see Jack for weekly meetings and slowly he himself started to mend back together. 


End file.
